I'm at my mom's house again. Sam, the home health nurse came this morning bright and early at 7:30. I had been up since 3am. That's when my "shift" started. Sam did mom's vitals. She weighed 103 pounds. Oxygen got up to 91, blood pressure was normal, no temperature, heart rate at 120. A normal resting heart rate is 60-80. She was having chest pains during the night. Her heart and lungs are having to work too hard. Sam ordered oxygen to help give them a break and hopefully allow mom to rest a little better.
We spent the morning trying to get mom comfortable. Grandma came over to help me. I was supposed to have given mom a bath, but she wasn't feeling up to it. Maybe tomorrow.
We met with Dr. Haslem at 10:30 in St. George. He was wonderful, but turns out mom has DIC, which is a blood condition where her blood cells are at war with each other and they just don't work anymore. It's a rare side effect to cancer, and since they can't get the cancer under control, they can't stop the bleeding. She will just have to continue spitting it out. She never complains about it. He also said there is nothing else they can do. We are supposed to spend the remaining time hoping for her comfort and time well spent with loved ones instead of hoping for a miracle. He eliminated some of her meds, which will make it easier for us to manage the daily schedule of it all.
Mom is so at peace. I think it was a relief to her, actually. She doesn't have to go through any more chemo, radiation, blood or platelet infusions, etc. She said today that she is ready. She's ready for the Lord's will to be done. She's ready to be out of pain. She is ready to go to sleep and not wake up again. She's ready to be with my dad again.
The rest of the day, mom spent laying on the couch, with her nasal canula and oxygen. Sleeping on and off. She dictated thank you cards to Kristan and I to write for her since she can't do it on her own anymore. That's my mom in a nut shell. She was told today she won't live more than a couple of weeks, and she spends her time thanking people for the flowers, meals, cards, quilt and banner from her elementary school, and friendship. Always thinking of others. I want to be just like her when I grow up.
It's 10:30 pm. I gave mom her night time meds and got her tucked as comfortably as possible in her rented hospital bed. My "shift" starts in just a few hours. I should get some rest.
10 comments:
Sending prayers for love, peace and rest to you and your family. I think you are a lot like your mom now and your dad too. Great combination! Amazed by you all.
Oh Becky. My heart aches for you and your family, and our prayers are with you guys at this fragile time. You are so strong and your Mom is amazing. She has been such a fighter and I am amazed at what she has gone through but still has such a positive outlook. Please let me know if you need anything!!!!
You are a great daughter Becky! I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I am only a text, call, email message away if you need someone to talk to. Love ya!
I wish I could be there to love and hug and comfort you and Aunt Jill, and everyone involved. My heart is aching. I am just in awe at how you are all doing. Know that I am ALWAYS thinking about all of you. SO much. xoxo
Becky,
I am so sorry for what you and your family are going through right now. I wish there was something I could do to make it easier for you. We will be praying for you and your family.
Becky, I have been waiting for an update on your mom and you. I can't think of anything to say except I'm thinking of you and praying for your mom and family. Love, Ann
I am so sorry your family has to go through this. It sounds so much like it was with Joyce. She went peacefully and was ready. I will pray for your family during this time sending love your way BEX!!
Oh Becky...my heart aches for you! I have been where you are, twice, and it hurts. But you will never regret your sleepless nights. NEVER. It is so beautiful to be there until the end, serving and loving. Hang in there. I know it's hard. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
You are so amazing Becky. My heart aches too. And like it was said before, you will never regret these sleepless nights. Those last moments with someone you love is priceless. You and your family have so much love and support and you know I will drop everything and come if you need me, just call. Love you and give your mom a hug for me and tell her I am so grateful for the awesome daughter she raised!
So sorry, Becky! My heart aches for you. Still keeping your family in our prayers!
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